Our fight is a fight that directly confronts power, and the history of power confronted has so often been the history of the powerless maimed, slaughtered and defeated.
Our struggle in particular presents a variety of barriers to be overcome and raises a range of questions that must be answered, including how to build an inclusive, self-sustaining movement capable of defeating the pro-Christmas lobby, as well as, what do we do with all the elves?
The primary task however confronting Marxmasists in building our movement in the here and now is bringing together and uniting a diversity of communities historically divided into our single project: the Movement for Marxmas. The central question is thus: how do we bring together the people of Karl Marx (the adult riff-raff), the people of Jesus Christ (the adult children), and the people of Santa Claus (the actual children)?
To pick the easy target first: attracting and solidifying the support of the people of Karl Marx, the Marxists, should be a simple task. Inherent within our movement are all their core values, from the anti-capitalism, to the idealism, to the ability to take a fun and relatively harmless thing and inject a truly horrendous amount of left-wing politics into it. They are lonesome, independent thinkers searching for solutions to the unsightly horrors of this world, and are usually easily morally pressured into supporting left-wing causes. Marxmas is such a left-wing cause.
Thus, Marxmas should be a simple sell. In fact, for a Marxist to not be a Marxmasist, should be seen as truly heretical.
Barriers to the Marxists joining the movement are minor and somewhat obvious. Many will have to overcome their general lack of a sense of humor. And all those tendencies for internecine fighting will need to be kept in check through strict, dogmatic, top-down, hierarchical discipline. But they'll love that.
The people of Santa Claus, the children, present a slightly increased challenge. Children are, as determined by their position in our society, difficult to reach. They are too often tucked away, kept under the watchful dominion of their parents most of the time. They are sometimes allowed to escape to child-specific spaces where adults always patrol, but otherwise a good child is a child that remains unseen.
The benefit of pitching Marxmas to children however is that they are yet to be inculcated into a world that makes simple ideas and solutions seem always out of reach. They haven’t taken enough college history classes, for example, to be able to confidently and condescendingly say, as if it's their own idea, “Marxmas, that's a great idea in theory, but it doesn't work in practice.”
The truth is a child's lack of experience in this world is, whilst often their most maligned feature, actually their most valuable. Many adults, in comparison, have had all their basic problem solving skills beaten out of them over the years. Take a simple pair of facts, for example: everyday people starve to death and we have enough food to feed everyone on Earth. Present this ‘problem’ to an adult, and they will almost always equivocate. Present it to a child, and they can solve it quite quickly: take some of the food and give it to the hungry people so they don’t starve to death.
This lack of ideological brainwashing, the absence of a quagmire of false ideas to trudge through hidden within the child’s mind, means the pitch for Marxmas is quite simple. Do you like Christmas? Yes? Well, everyday should be like Christmas. That is what our movement aims to achieve. And we call that movement, Marxmas.
We will be signing the children up in droves, comrades.
The Jesus Christ types, the adult children, will be harder to win over, partly because thus far we have been condescendingly referring to them as adult children. But really this should be taken as a compliment – when it comes to adults and children, as we've touched on briefly above, children are the smart ones.
Some of the religious fanatics will certainly be lost in the struggle for Marxmas, lost to the side of reaction and the arguments of the Christmas capitalists. This will likely be a division primarily on class lines though. Those rich, profiteering Christians who see Christmas as a money well can be expected to align themselves with the pro-Christmas lobby. Those ordinary, working-class Christians however, who have simply sought out an opium to quell their worldly despair, we must believe can be won to our side.
The one thing these adult children do share with Marxmasists is a hatred for what Christmas has become. This is the key to unlocking their support. These are people who can recognise some of the good aspects of Christmas – the joy of spending time with family and friends, and the seasonal resurgence of kindness, compassion and a sense of community. And they, too, despair at the festival of decadent capitalist indulgence and consumption that Christmas has become. This pinpointing of shared agreement and shared disgust presents a path forward for unity.
Yes, Marxmas does technically involve slaying their messiah and replacing him with a commie, but they secretly love that kind of stuff. What would modern Christianity be if Pontius didn’t murder their boy?
Most importantly, the Movement for Marxmas will end what we, the Marxmasists and the Jesus lovers, both see as a desecration of the 25th of December, whilst, of course, providing room for people to have whatever religious beliefs they want, even if all religions will eventually be replaced by hierarchical decree with the singular, holy religion of our messiah Saint Marx.
This is how we begin, comrades, to create an impregnable united front. To Marxmas, the Marxists should come by their own accord. The simplicity of our solution should attract the Santa Claus believers. And the desire to destroy the modern bastardization of Christmas should win at least a few of the God-fearing workers to our side.
Let the Christmas capitalists shake in their boots. The adult riff-raff, the adult children, and the actual children, united, will never be defeated!